sweetner

We clicked instantly, right from the beginning. Her confidence was attractive. I gravitated towards her so naturally, as if her's was the only force meant to drive me. I was obsessed with how keen she was, both academically and pragmatically. She had hundreds of opinions about thousands of topics in each of the million trivial conversations we had. She went from referring mundane situations to quotes from her favorite novel to linking lenz law with zoology; from sticking to a mindset of hating chemical reactions to being insanely in love with arangetral; from wanting to learn as much physics as possible to wanting to pursue writing as a career; from being an activist & yearning to change the world, her world, to completely isolating herself when she felt the surrounding was too loud. We grew together I'd like to say, but I feel like I hardly played a part in her life; unlike me, she lit me up. She dipped herself into literature, taking me with her. "You write elegantly" is what she said when I showed her my first attempt at writing. And how do I tell you that THAT ONE LITTLE COMPLIMENT was enough to lift me up the dark hole of ignorance and I sprinted forward to romaticise literature, aching to foster my skills. She was my biggest enthusiast and I was her's. I adored the way she always showed her first writes to me. Although, she wasn't so prim and prude as you might assume. She was all shades of red and black. She liked spice in her life and I liked her in mine. In 18 years of my unembellished life, not once did I bother to question my sexuality, yet she made me, in the span of a year. I kept it to myself. I was heavily intoxicated by her aura and I knew she wasn't by mine. And as the laws of physics say, two opposite charges attract each other until a third charge, greater in magnitude enters; I lost her, forever and ever and ever. 

She's gone and she took the spark of intellect with her.